Queen Biyachessa

Rants, Raves, Entertainment, Music all in One

Archive for January, 2010

Parental Guidance

Posted by Biyachessa On January - 23 - 2010

My parents left today. They’re going back to Papua New Guinea for their work.

They’ve done this many times before but I never can seem to get used to it. Years back, when they first brought us here to the Philippines and then they had to leave us here, we – my sister and I who were then 12 and 15 I think – would cry so much before they left. I’d try to swallow hard to prevent the tears from coming every time I saw my mother packing, I’d even leave quickly to go to school so I didn’t have to see her put stuff in her luggage; and yet, I would still find myself sobbing – before they leave and even more after they’ve gone inside the airport. They’ve done this so many times in the 7 years I’ve been here in the Philippines, and I still haven’t gotten used to it. Even if I’m already 19 and all, I still feel so lonely every time they leave. Is that the after effects of having grown in an empty house? I’m more mature now, I’m sure, but even if this is like, their 3rd time to leave in a year and knowing they’d be back in March (my brother’s graduation), I still feel like the first time they had to leave us here. It still doesn’t feel regular or like I’ve done it before. I try to tell myself that I wouldn’t cry that they’d be back in March and 2 months shouldn’t be that hard, but I just can’t help the fact that even in that 2 months, I’ll still be missing them. I already do and they haven’t even been away for more than 30 minutes. It’s so hard having to have parents away from you. The effects seem forever and I don’t actually know how to fix me – or it.

Being away from your parents makes you miss a lot of stuff, their guidance, their love, their help in problems; when your parents aren’t there, you won’t have stuff like that. You can grow up with a lot of problems – in commitment, loyalty, family, priorities and all that, because they’re not there for you. I don’t blame my parents, it is after all, for our own good that they have to go.

But to those who hate their parents, to those who wish their parents are gone, to those who disrespect and fool their parents; don’t take them for granted. Our parents are the people responsible for us and however disfunctional they may prove to be, you need them and they need you. Stop thinking that your parents are against you, there’s more to them than you realize; they’re human too and there’s more to their love than you realize.

So love them like there’s no tomorrow. Love them because they gave you life. Love them, because they care enough to do something for you. Love them, because they shout and scream at you every time you come home late or drunk. Love them, because in your worst times, they’re the only hands you can hold. Love them, not because they give you allowance and money, but because they live life for you.

Imagine living a life without someone to fight with over boys. Imagine a life without a father to hug on Father’s Day or a mother on Mother’s Day. Imagine a life without parents. It’s not easy and no matter how strong or matured you are, you owe your parents big time and unfortunately, not even billions of money can pay off the efforts of your years of growing up.

To my Mother and Father, I love you both so much. Have a safe trip to Papua New Guinea and call me. ^^

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Update – A Return

Posted by Biyachessa On January - 22 - 2010

Okay, so maybe I haven’t written in a long time – alright – a very long time. You can’t blame me though. Blame my OJT and work. Bad OJT, bad work – not giving me enough time to write!

Anyway, I have decided that right after my OJT is over, I must start writing again in my website – I feel it’s getting ribbed my flies already.

That’s probably by next week, or at least after Midterms. I have so much to tell you!

I’m also going to be starting a new category here – Travel. I’ve been to some really good places this past few days and it seems like a waste if I don’t write it down for everyone else to experience right?

Anyway, I haven’t had the hang of travel blogging yet but I do hope to learn from some of the experts. I’m such a young blogger that I have so much more to learn.

By the way. Did I tell you Paramore is going to be in Manila in MARCH?? How crazy is THAT?

I am dying to go. I swear, whoever takes me to Paramore’s concert then, I will truly love and even marry and be their slave forever.

It’s been such a long time since I wrote. I kinda miss it. I hate not being able to take care of my website, I feel like I abandon it or something – which I don’t intend to do.

I still have some loyal readers though, thanks guys.

I really hope to get more good news to you guys in the next few days. I only have less than 50 hours to go in my OJT so I am taking it slower now.

I promise. You’ll be seeing more of me now. ;)

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To See You Again

Posted by Biyachessa On January - 9 - 2010

For you, you f^cking asshole.

Sorry for the language, guys. I’m just in a really, really, really bad mood. I can’t believe there are actually guys like him. And pathetic as it may seem – guys I was (alright, alright, am) attracted to.

Suddenly, you’re all I see again.
You’re like the most beautiful scenery in the world,
Every single time I look at you.
You’re like the light that shines through my window
On bright mornings after a storm

You’re all I see again
In that crazy spiked and colored hair
In that newly grown, manly hair above your lips
And beautiful, knee-shaking smile
Forming from your naturally pinkish lips

You’re all I see again
With the sourness of our love
I can’t ever forget
The beauty behind each tear
And love beneath each frown

You’re all I see again
Despite the many men that have come to pass
Despite the men that have lied and loved
The many men that have ruined me
And made me bitter and angry

You’re all I see again
And somehow I still want to believe
With you it’s like magic
With you it’s just like the beauty of Christmas day
With you it’s just so simple

With you, I’m me
And with you, I’ve got everything I need
With you there is hope
And with you there is love
When I see you again.

To See You Again
~010710Adrian~

I literally am angry at him.
And worse, I’m angry probably because I still have the strongest feelings for him that I’ve never had for anyone else. Just for him.
It’s a long story and I’m afraid I can’t really tell it all. It’s too embarrassing on my part. Okay, so maybe someday I will tell you. After I blog about my Christmas and New Year. How was your vacations everyone? Did it suck as much as mine did? If it didn’t, good for you.

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Queen Biyachessa is a personal blog containing posts about entertainment, music, television, twitter, random and personal opinions not meant to harm or offend anyone and literary works that are under copyright only to the author of this blog.

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